Look — Ocean Drive after 8 PM is basically Times Square with worse drinks and more aggressive promoters. You'll pay $20 covers to get into places that charge $25 for well-liquor mojitos while dodging drunk NYU kids taking Instagram photos with neon Art Deco signs.

Here's the thing: Collins Avenue is literally one block west. Same beach access, actual locals, and half the prices. You want proof? Broken Shaker at the Freehand Hostel (2727 Indian Creek Dr) makes legitimately excellent cocktails — Their mezcal program rivals dedicated cocktail bars in the Village — Without the circus atmosphere of Ocean Drive's tourist traps.

Here's what you're avoiding: $18 frozen daiquiris that taste like sugar water, restaurant hosts who literally grab your arm to drag you inside, and cover charges at "clubs" that are basically sports bars with louder music. Collins Avenue gives you the same beach vibes with places where you can actually have conversations instead of shouting over EDM remixes of pop songs.

The math is simple: Ocean Drive mojito ($25) versus Sweet Caroline bar on Collins ($12 for something infinitely better). That's New York tourist trap pricing for Miami Beach quality. Don't be that guy.